I'm home today, as S is sick. Poor thing vomited at school yesterday. Fortunately, she made it to the restroom!
I'm sick of cold and snow.
I'm sick of having no washing machine. I spent $33 and almost 3 hours at the laundromat last night.
I should have replaced the damn thing when it broke in November--I'm sure I've more than paid for it in quarters spent at the laundromat! I suppose I cut my nose off to spite my face--I didn't think I should pay for a washer for XH to use.
I'm sick of being married. (You probably knew that already)
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Since I posted yesterday, I've been thinking that I'm probably way too optimistic about how quickly/easily this divorce will happen.
During my meeting yesterday with my lawyer, we discussed how I want to ask for the debts to be settled. I think all of the marital debts (i.e. not my student loans) should be paid off from the sale of the house, then the remaining proceeds divided 50/50.
Sounds fair, right?
It sounds perfectly fair to me, which is when I start to worry. Remember: this is the man who tried to bribe me with a washer/dryer, and offered to leave only if I took all the debts and paid him $25,000!!
About six weeks ago, XH gave me a typed (!) list of what he wants from the house/conditions of the divorce. (I'll try to .pdf it and post it tomorow.)
Number 31 on the list: 0% of financial debt as per Steff's promise to me
Helloooo?!?!? I promised to take all of the debt if he'd LEAVE the HOUSE! We've all been living here together, which totally sucks and is confusing for the kids.
Honestly, I would have taken the debts if, back in November, he had packed his shit and left. Probably stupid on my part, but would have been worth it to me for the peace and sanity.
As it is, my lawyer thinks I am being more than generous--I do not want to claim my half of his pension, nor do I want him to split the attorney fees and court costs.
I do, however, want sole custody of the kids. In IL, sole custody means I have sole decision-making power regarding the kids' health, education and religion. Custody has zero effect on visitation, which XH is too stupid and/or obtuse to understand. He, upon reading the initial petition, accused me of trying to "take his kids away" from him.
As I keep explaining to the kids: he is their dad, will always be their dad. He will be their dad no matter where we live, with Daddy or without. And we've talked a bit about how much more relaxed (S's description, not mine) it is when the kids are with Daddy (without Mommy) or with Mommy (without Daddy). I.E. NOT OUR CURRENT LIVING SITUATION
That's why the kids are in counseling! They love it, though. We were very fortunate to get a wonderful "fit" with the EAP referral!
Maybe I should break out my yoga dvd. I have a feeling I'll need it over the next few weeks. He should get "the papers" within 2-3 weeks. The ones he needs to sign.
Keep me in your thoughts!
During my meeting yesterday with my lawyer, we discussed how I want to ask for the debts to be settled. I think all of the marital debts (i.e. not my student loans) should be paid off from the sale of the house, then the remaining proceeds divided 50/50.
Sounds fair, right?
It sounds perfectly fair to me, which is when I start to worry. Remember: this is the man who tried to bribe me with a washer/dryer, and offered to leave only if I took all the debts and paid him $25,000!!
About six weeks ago, XH gave me a typed (!) list of what he wants from the house/conditions of the divorce. (I'll try to .pdf it and post it tomorow.)
Number 31 on the list: 0% of financial debt as per Steff's promise to me
Helloooo?!?!? I promised to take all of the debt if he'd LEAVE the HOUSE! We've all been living here together, which totally sucks and is confusing for the kids.
Honestly, I would have taken the debts if, back in November, he had packed his shit and left. Probably stupid on my part, but would have been worth it to me for the peace and sanity.
As it is, my lawyer thinks I am being more than generous--I do not want to claim my half of his pension, nor do I want him to split the attorney fees and court costs.
I do, however, want sole custody of the kids. In IL, sole custody means I have sole decision-making power regarding the kids' health, education and religion. Custody has zero effect on visitation, which XH is too stupid and/or obtuse to understand. He, upon reading the initial petition, accused me of trying to "take his kids away" from him.
As I keep explaining to the kids: he is their dad, will always be their dad. He will be their dad no matter where we live, with Daddy or without. And we've talked a bit about how much more relaxed (S's description, not mine) it is when the kids are with Daddy (without Mommy) or with Mommy (without Daddy). I.E. NOT OUR CURRENT LIVING SITUATION
That's why the kids are in counseling! They love it, though. We were very fortunate to get a wonderful "fit" with the EAP referral!
Maybe I should break out my yoga dvd. I have a feeling I'll need it over the next few weeks. He should get "the papers" within 2-3 weeks. The ones he needs to sign.
Keep me in your thoughts!
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Progress!
I apologize to anyone who's looked here in the past few weeks and found nothing new. Sorry!
I have been crazy busy at work. The company I work for acquired a division of another company, and I've been busy working on my part of the integration.
BIG NEWS!!
I met with my lawyer today--XH finally brought his documents to her, and she went over them with me. She can now begin working on the judgement papers!
We are attempting to do a non-contested divorce, so hopefully he will just sign the papers and not be a dick.
I doubt it, though.
He is still lobbying pretty hard to get me to "call off" the divorce. It's exhausting.
Dude, I'm NOT going to change my mind.
I have been crazy busy at work. The company I work for acquired a division of another company, and I've been busy working on my part of the integration.
BIG NEWS!!
I met with my lawyer today--XH finally brought his documents to her, and she went over them with me. She can now begin working on the judgement papers!
We are attempting to do a non-contested divorce, so hopefully he will just sign the papers and not be a dick.
I doubt it, though.
He is still lobbying pretty hard to get me to "call off" the divorce. It's exhausting.
Dude, I'm NOT going to change my mind.
Monday, February 4, 2008
Another compelling reason to lose weight...
On Saturday, not long before A was struck (pun intended) with a bowling ball, the Lane Bryant store where I bought the pants I'm wearing today was robbed, with tragic results.
I seriously do at least 90% of my shopping in that plaza.
I'd like to think that if I were in the store at the time, I would not have allowed the gunman to herd me to the back room. The outcome never seems to be good when you're brought to the back at gunpoint.
I seriously do at least 90% of my shopping in that plaza.
I'd like to think that if I were in the store at the time, I would not have allowed the gunman to herd me to the back room. The outcome never seems to be good when you're brought to the back at gunpoint.
Saturday, February 2, 2008
Bowling is a Contact Sport
It is when my kids do it!
The kids bowl in a youth league on Saturday mornings, where XH is the coach. He keeps an eye on them, but doesn't constantly supervise, as he has to be available to all of the other kids on the league.
I had plans for today--in fact, I was with friends at Do-it-Yourself Dinners making Tasty Tortellini Soup when my cell phone rang.
I was expecting XH to call between noon and 12:30 for me to pick up the kids. My phone rang at 11:20.
"You have to get over here now. A got hit in the head with a bowling ball, and an ambulance is on the way."
WHAT?!?!?!?!?
Fortunately, I was less than a mile away, and I tend to be very calm in medical emergencies. I got there just after the paramedics arrived. My son, my baby, was being checked out and had a HUGE lump on his head. It was above the eyebrow, not on the temple. S was sitting nearby, sobbing uncontrollably.
From what I can piece together, A bowled his frame, and walked off the lane. He was standing by the ball return, when S walked up. She grabbed her ball and swung it back, whacking him right on the head.
It was an accident, and for a minute, we thought she was going to pass out from crying so hard.
The paramedics checked A over, and recommended we take him to the ER, but did not think he needed ambulance transport.
A wanted only Mommy, so XH and S rode in XH's truck, while A and I followed. On the way, I called the pediatrician, who told us which local hospital she preferred.
We got to the ER at about 11:45. Called into triage at 12:15. Sat in waiting room until about 3:45.
While we waited, A had an ice pack on his head, and the swelling subsided a bit. Once he was called back, the doctor saw him quickly. Did a neurological exam, and said that even though A was acting "fine" he wanted a CT scan--mainly because the lump was so large.
A got to ride on the gurney to radiology, which he thought was pretty cool. He behaved beautifully during the scan.
His CT did not show any skull or brain injury, but did show some fluid in his left sinus. (The injury is on his right.)
That's right folks, all day in the ER for a diagnosis of contusion (aka "bump on the head") and sinusitis.
Children's Advil and Sudafed.
That's okay--far better than many alternatives. Unfortunately, A refused to let me take a picture. "Mom, they took a picture at the hospital."
I'll save the story about S's bowling ball injury for another time...
The kids bowl in a youth league on Saturday mornings, where XH is the coach. He keeps an eye on them, but doesn't constantly supervise, as he has to be available to all of the other kids on the league.
I had plans for today--in fact, I was with friends at Do-it-Yourself Dinners making Tasty Tortellini Soup when my cell phone rang.
I was expecting XH to call between noon and 12:30 for me to pick up the kids. My phone rang at 11:20.
"You have to get over here now. A got hit in the head with a bowling ball, and an ambulance is on the way."
WHAT?!?!?!?!?
Fortunately, I was less than a mile away, and I tend to be very calm in medical emergencies. I got there just after the paramedics arrived. My son, my baby, was being checked out and had a HUGE lump on his head. It was above the eyebrow, not on the temple. S was sitting nearby, sobbing uncontrollably.
From what I can piece together, A bowled his frame, and walked off the lane. He was standing by the ball return, when S walked up. She grabbed her ball and swung it back, whacking him right on the head.
It was an accident, and for a minute, we thought she was going to pass out from crying so hard.
The paramedics checked A over, and recommended we take him to the ER, but did not think he needed ambulance transport.
A wanted only Mommy, so XH and S rode in XH's truck, while A and I followed. On the way, I called the pediatrician, who told us which local hospital she preferred.
We got to the ER at about 11:45. Called into triage at 12:15. Sat in waiting room until about 3:45.
While we waited, A had an ice pack on his head, and the swelling subsided a bit. Once he was called back, the doctor saw him quickly. Did a neurological exam, and said that even though A was acting "fine" he wanted a CT scan--mainly because the lump was so large.
A got to ride on the gurney to radiology, which he thought was pretty cool. He behaved beautifully during the scan.
His CT did not show any skull or brain injury, but did show some fluid in his left sinus. (The injury is on his right.)
That's right folks, all day in the ER for a diagnosis of contusion (aka "bump on the head") and sinusitis.
Children's Advil and Sudafed.
That's okay--far better than many alternatives. Unfortunately, A refused to let me take a picture. "Mom, they took a picture at the hospital."
I'll save the story about S's bowling ball injury for another time...
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